Goodbye, Dad

 

My father passed away in February, and I'd planned on writing this tribute to him soon after.  But with issues at work, and moving, I just wasn't able to bring myself to sit down and spend the time to express my thanks to how he shape my life.

I think part of the problem was how he died.  Unlike my mother, who died three years ago after a fall, my father died before my eyes.  He moved back to the Pacific Northwest last year, just before his ninetieth birthday, to live with my brother in Vancouver, WA.  It meant I was able to see him more often than yearly visits in Florida, which were placed on hold thanks to COVID.  He seemed in pretty good health, so my brothers and I thought we had a few years to be with him.  But, as fall and winter set in, and the COVID isolation mandates continued, we could see the toll being locked in the house took upon him.

 At least we were able to celebrate his ninetieth birthday with him.

But, watching his mind and body fail him over time, it was a relief when my youngest brother called me to say he'd passed on, as the last time I saw him, he was just a shell.  No spark to remind me of who he was, just a body breathing on autopilot.  It was difficult dealing with his passing, but wasn't as hard as with my mother, whose sudden death was the result of an accident.

Enough of that.  This is a chance for me to say how he influenced my love for classic monsters, horror, sci fi and fantasy.  And I have to say, like my mom, he couldn't understand where my interests came from.  But he accepted who I was, and made sure I learned things outside my interest.  Dad taught me how to do basic electrical and plumbing, and how to fix a car (before all the computer interfacing required you to take your car to a mechanic), lessons I still use to this day.

But Dad was also instrumental in fostering my love of reading.  When my family moved to the Pacific Northwest in the 70s, he worked cabin maintenance for a major airline.  It was a major step down from his previous job as a mechanic, but he kept working it until he retired.  This was before Kindle, so people brought paperback novels onto airplanes and often left them after the flight.  So he'd always bring home some great stuff for me to read, from "trashy" horror novels and sci fi novels to best sellers like Jaws and The Exorcist.  I also learned he traded "men's" magazines with his co-workers for novels he thought I'd like.  It wasn't that he'd keep them, he just knew, when he found them, he could use them to keep me supplied with books.  And, like my mother, he didn't care what I read, as long as I was reading. 

As for my love of genre, it's always be a point of speculation at the family dinner table.  Now, my brothers and I were able to find that my parents attended the premiere screening of Psycho when she was pregnant with me (yes, I'm that old) and, at one family dinner, I postulated that the rise in adrenaline and other hormones Mom experienced while watching Psycho caused my love of genre.  My mom looked at me and said, "No, it was when Vera Miles turned around Mrs. Bates.  Your father jumped in her lap.  That's what did it."  

My brothers and I started laughing, while Dad just shrugged his shoulders and said, "Yeah, that's basically what happened."

 So, if you're ever watching Psycho with me and I'm smiling at this scene, you know why.

To say my father didn't like horror films would be an understatement.  But I remember the night I was watching Army of Darkness on VHS, and my dad came home from work, as he was working a swing shift.  He sat down, asked what I was watching and to fill him in.  I did, and after Ash retrieved the Book of the Dead, he said, "This is too stupid, I'm going to bed."  This was after laughing as Ash was assaulted in Three Stoogies style by the Deadites (Oh, I should mention he was a fan of the Stoogies and Benny Hill; thank you for that as well, Dad).  But five minutes later, he came out and said, "I have to see how this ends."  I offered to rewind the film, but he was fine with my summery.  And when the Classic came out with the whirling windmill blades, he smiled and said, "You don't see that every day."

 And he was right.  You won't see that on the freeway.

He said the same thing when I brought home the first original Mortal Combat, and Goro entered the picture. But he was fine watching that film, as he loved a good action film.  Which is how I made him a Jackie Chan fan.  Police Story will do that.

And, to his credit, he never had a problem with me switching away from the Wide World of Sports, or some other sports event, during a commercial break to catch a glimpse of the monster movie on Channel 12 at the time.  Though I suspect he was happy when Mom relented and allowed me to buy a small black and white television for my room, so he got to watch sports uninterrupted.

But, my favorite story about Dad took place several years ago in Florida.  I was staying in my parent's guest bedroom, filled with all their trinkets and several antiques.  I'd spent a lot of time painting their kitchen and living room, and as payment, my mom told me I could pick something from the room to take home with me.  I spent a few seconds looking over the room, than came out with a resin figure of Honest John from Disney's Pinoochio, which he'd purchased it as a kid after seeing the film.

"So," Mom asked, "why'd you pick that?"

"Well, it's kind of link with Dad," I said.  "I buy figures from films I like, and this is the only one he ever bought.  So it's special in my eyes."

Dad nodded.  "Good choice, son.  I love that figure.  Give it a good home."

"It's not going on eBay, right?" Mom asked.

"Hell no," I replied.  "I'm displaying it with some of my figures."

A few weeks after I got home, I was on the phone with my parents.  "So," Dad asked me, "did you look up what the figure's worth?"

"Yeah, I was curious," I said.  "I could get up to $500 for it."

"And..." Mom said.

"It's staying right were it is, next to my figure of Boris Karloff as The Mummy."

And it's still there today, though Angela is hanging out in the shadows.

 Good bye, Dad.  I love you and I'll miss you.  I hope you and Mom are dancing on a beach somewhere.

 My parents and I on a trip to Silver Springs in Florida, so I could see where they filmed Revenge of the Creature.