Frightfully Funny Friday: 10/18 edition

If you ever wonder why so many characters do such stupid things in horror films, check out the faux trailer for Hell, No: The Sensible Horror Film.  

This short features some language and scenes that are probably NSFW.

Yea, we'd be in and out of the theater in 15 minutes or less....

I, Frankenstein looks amazingly bad

Maybe I should have saved this for Frightfully Funny Friday, but it's not very funny.  In fact, it's quite depressing....

I watched the first part of this trailer in shock, wondering who was insane enough to turn The Monster into a reluctant action hero.  But once I saw the producers of the Underworld series were involved, everything about this trailer made sense.  It's the same formula that gave us Kate Beckinsale in pleather, or a tortured vampire falling in love with a Slayer.

The script writes itself at this point.  Take one brooding monster who is humanity's only hope against an army of CGI generated supernatural beings, add in massive battles, collapsing buildings and huge explosions.  Of course, the final ingredient is the inclusion of a British actor (in this case, Bill Nighy) as the villain, just to give the production a hint of class.  Stir well, then sit back and wait for a big opening weekend in January.

Of course, the expected outcome is another monster-as-hero franchise, which would be easy enough to ignore.  But the unholy offspring, should I, Frankenstein make enough money, will be studios rebooting other classic horror characters as heroes.

As one example, I'm sure some studio executive would love to turn Doctor Jekyll into a darker version of The Hulk, after that character made such an impression on audiences in The Avengers.  Just imagine the 3D CGI mayhem on the screen as a steroid-crazed Mr. Hyde battles a demonic horde intent on ruling the Earth.  After all, massive CGI destruction is a sure fire ingredient for big box office.

Or maybe Universal will finally reboot The Gill-Man, but turn him into humanity's only hope against an evil oil company CEO intent on using his off shore drilling operations to open the Gates of Hell.  Oh, and get Miley Cyrus to put on the swimsuit, as underwater twerking will look great in 3D!  A depressing thought, I know, but given Universal's recent track record rebooting their collection of monsters, such an unholy abomination is an almost certain outcome.

Before you chastise me for giving a studio head any ideas, I suspect such treatments (or ones even worse) are already on hold, as executives wait to see how I, Frankenstein does in the box office.  And if the studios smell money coming from this film, 2015 is could be a very long, depressing year.

It's time for Frightfully Funny Friday!

Yes, I know, I know.  I posted the Friday the 13th edition, then when silent.  But work kicked me in the teeth last month, and I got a bit sick with the flu, I was attacked by CHUDs, beaten by the Kids in the Corn, The Car ran out of gas, my appointment with Dr. Giggles ran late, my kid's Good Guy doll went crazy, the Kaiju blocked the freeway...

Look, it wasn't my fault!

And if you didn't catch the reference, go back and watch The Blues Brothers.

Anyway, here's something that's been about the Internet for a couple of days, but damn, it's GREAT.  And a lot of fun!!!

Oh, it's Hellboy Willy!!!  Way too many references for one viewing, I hope this teaser means the Treehouse of Horror episode has returned to it's former glory.  If not, we always have this.

Oh, my. I missed the last two Frightfully Funny Fridays!

Oh, curse my day job.  You know, the one that doesn't involve The Shadow Over Portland, yet keeps a roof over my head and the Internet at my beck and call.  Seriously, being a brain dead zombie at the end of the work day keeps me from the post, and I apologize for such shortcomings.

Still, I have something to share with you, and Michael Bay.  It comes from the wisdom of YouTube, the idea that if you are going to make a senseless remake of a classic film, you can make it fabulous with a scene including the Benny Hill theme.

Yea, I know I had a moment like this on Friday the 13th, but it's still pretty funny.....

Enjoy!

Atomic Brain Invasion (2010)

One can only imagine how difficult it is to make an homage to 50s genre movies.  The filmmaker has to expect modern sensibilities to creep into the story, yet must be kept in check lest the script becomes little more than cliché comparisons to the past.  And walking the fine line between poking fun and delving into outright mockery can become problematic.

Atomic Brain Invasion manages, for the most part, to sidestep these pitfalls.  Part of the reason is director Richard Griffin and co-writer Guy Benoit seemed more concerned with crafting a fun alien invasion film, rather than just delivering a film set in the 50s.  And thanks to their efforts, the film is one fans of the genre, and the casual viewer, will enjoy.

Uh-huh.  Elvis says you have to watch this film.

Despite the simple title, the plot is a bit more complicated than expected.  After a brief introduction to our main cast, an alien canister full of nefarious slime lands on Earth.  The hapless victims exposed to this goo shed their heads and become evil brain aliens, though the effect isn’t as graphic as you might expect.  However, to create a horde of Brain Invaders, the beings puke neon colored slime into the mouth of their victims.  Yea, that’s a bit gross, but just go with it.

Meanwhile, the film’s high-school nerd heroes find a spacecraft containing a trio of aliens demanding to be taken to “the King.”  And, surprise, Elvis is performing in the area, so all these aliens want is to see the King of Rock and Roll.  But the evil aliens want to take Elvis to their home world, so our heroes must protect him while unraveling a government conspiracy concerning a “hidden” nuclear test site. 

Yea, no one will notice that

Toss in a greaser hoodlum with an origami fascination and an alcoholic Scotsman (is there any other in such movies?) who might be the victim of an alien abduction, and you’ve got a recipe for disaster.  But the film works, thanks to the goofy script that is more a sweet kiss on the cheek to movies of the past, rather than a harsh slap to the face.

But for this film to work, you have to accept that it occurs on an alternate Earth where equality is more advanced than present day America.  The film’s hero, Sherrman (David Lavaliee Jr.), is an African-American and the fact that he’s in love with the lily-white Betty (Sarah Nicklin) is never questioned by his friends.  The only racial slur, mentioned by the greaser hoodlum, is pretty tame compared to the words used back in the 50s.  Oh, and we have an Asian American student that is thought of fondly by most of the men in town, which would feel out of place for a movie from the era.

I mention this point because one scene during the final act.  And while it’s hard not to appreciate what the filmmakers are saying, the scene stops the film’s momentum and feels like it drags out too long.  Yet, the script kick backs into high gear soon after, thanks to a couple of sudden revelations concerning the Brain Invaders. 

Yea, they aren't as smart as they look

And these sudden plot twists work, thanks to a crafty script that sets up everything earlier in the film.  You might not catch every bit upon your first viewing, but it makes a second viewing enjoyable, and I suspect you will want to see this one again.

The cast is terrific, playing up the campiness of the script without turning their performance into a mockery of past genre films.  Lavaliee and Nicklin are perfect as high school students thrust into the roles of heroes, and their moments of hysteria are quite believable. Sherman’s friends (played by Daniel Lee White and Colin Carlton) are fun to watch, as is Michael Reed, Sherman’s antagonist and his rival for Betty’s affections.  And David Erin Wilson’s performance as General Bedfellow is better than one would expect for the character.  He keeps the General from becoming an outright parody of the military characters from the 50s, which one would expect from a modern film playing off 50s stereotypes.

As for the Brain Invaders, the creature effects look great for the budget (and yes, you have to take that into consideration), thanks to some skillful staging.  And though the aliens might seem a bit goofy, their behavior makes sense as the film progresses and allows the audience to believe a group of teenagers could thwart this alien invasion.  That might seem like a strange statement, but wait for the siege on the diner and you’ll get the point.  

Nope, this has nothing to do with how the siege goes, but the end results are pretty funny.  

If you love 50s alien invasion movies, you’ll enjoy Alien Brain Invasion.  And if you’re not familiar with those older films, it doesn’t matter.  The filmmakers capture the spirit of the genre better than most modern homage films, while allowing you to laugh at the troupes of the genre.  It’s a rare balancing act and the filmmakers pull it off, delivering a loving tribute that only pokes fun at a bygone genre, rather than outright mocking it.  

My only complaint is the DVD has a rather generic cover, rather than the comic book style cover I used to open my review.  Had that artwork been included, the DVD would be perfect.  But don't let that very minor quibble keep you from watching or, better yet, buying this film.  It's terrific fun and a great movie to share with friends.  Don't pass it up.

The Return of Frightfully Funny Fridays!

Happy Friday the 13th!  And what better day to start up Frightfully Funny Fridays once again!

So, remember, this is the one day to avoid all the fun things in life, like booze, drugs and sex.  And, for god's sake, STAY OUT OF THE WOODS!!

WARNING: This clip contains a bit of graphic violence, so be safe watching it at work.

The Ghost and Mr. Chicken (1966)

Ask horror fans about their favorite childhood films and I bet no one would include the Don Knotts comedy, The Ghost and Mr. Chicken as part of their list.  But I assume most horror kids growing up in the 60s probably saw this one and I would suggest checking it out again, as the film works rather well when it stays in the “haunted” house.  And, I suspect, the Saturday morning cartoons you watched back in the 70s got a small bit of inspiration from this dark old house comedy.

The story follows Luther Heggs (Knotts), a typesetter for the small newspaper in Rachel, Kansas.  Luther has dreams of being a reporter and patrols the town at night in search of his big scoop.  He also wants to date the quite fetching Alma (Joan Staley), who’s dating the town’s main reporter, Ollie (Skip Homeier).

Atta boy, Luther!

Luther takes a major step in realizing his dream when he inserts his own story about the town’s infamous murder house as filler on the paper’s front page.  Dictated by Mr. Kelsey, the papers janitor, Luther writes about the murder/suicide twenty years ago, and the mysterious activity that occurs within the abandoned house ever since.

The story is a hit and George Beckett (Dick Sargent), the paper’s editor, decides that Luther should stay in the house during the 20^th anniversary of the deaths and report on the strange events.  Luther is hesitant, but agrees and enters the house just before midnight. 

Once the clock strikes twelve, Luther hears strange noises and finds a hidden passageway leading to a room where an organ is playing by itself.  Before racing out of the house, he comes across a painting of Mrs. Simmons, stabbed by a pair of garden shears and dripping blood.

Yep, that's a spooky old house, alright.

Luther returns to the pressroom in a state of hysteria, but is able to give Ollie and George enough details to allow them to write a story.  Luther gets his break and soon, he’s dating Alma and bathing in the fame bestowed upon him by the town.  At least until he and the paper are sued for libel by the remaining member of the Simmons family, whose plans to bulldoze the house are thwarted by the coverage.

At the trial, Luther is humiliated, and things unravel further once the court reconvenes at the Simmons house later that night.  As no ghostly apparitions appear after midnight, Luther is discredited and ostracized by his supporters.  But once the crowd leaves the scene, Alma finds the mysterious passageway, while Luther hears the organ playing once again and races upstairs to solve the mystery.

Only he doesn’t solve the mystery, or really do anything in the film.  Luther may be the protagonist of this tale, but he’s not the hero.  He is given credit for stories written by others and the mystery of the Simmons house is reveled by another character.  Of course, Luther is in the foreground, strutting about as if he knew everything, which is no surprise, as the movie seems designed for Knotts to bring his Barney Fife character to the big screen (Knotts left The Andy Griffith Show a year before the release of this film).  And the bloated second act, as Knott trying to act the heroic figure and justify everyone’s admiration, re-enforces that the film is centered on Knotts's shtick. 

Who needs MMA training when you have mail order Karate classes?

So why am I writing this review, you might ask.  Well, I have a long history with this film, having seen it for the first time at a Florida drive-in when I was five years old.  My parents weren’t fans of horror films, and this was the first spooky movie I remember seeing on the big screen.  And, as my parents wouldn’t let me watch scary movies on television when I was a kid, I think it’s safe to say this was my first Universal “horror” movie.

When my family moved to Portland in the mid 70s, this film was on a yearly rotation schedule on KPTV.  So, on rainy Northwest days, I take the chance to watch anything remotely scary once my parents allowed me to have a small black and white television in my bedroom.  Okay, it wasn’t because they thought I was old enough, but more likely to keep my younger brothers and I from fighting over what to watch during football season.  Either way, the situation worked for me.

Still, like the magic dragon Puff, Mr. Chicken eventually faded from my memory with the advent of VHS and cable.  At least until a few weeks ago, when I spied a used DVD at a local Videorama and decided, in a fit of nostalgia, to purchase it so I could relieve a bit of my childhood. 

And I’m glad I did, because once you get past the middle act, the film is a fun little chiller.  The moments in the Simmons house work rather well.  The house looks creepy enough, but the lighting is bright enough, and overly colorful at times, to keep from being too scary.  And the script, for being little more than a Don Knotts family comedy, is pretty smart.  Screenwriters James Fritzell and Everett Greenbaum set everything up in the opening act, delivering clues like a mystery movie that allows the final revel to make sense.  One could watch the opening act after viewing the movie just to see how a few well-placed moments in easily overlooked scenes set up the climax.

The cast is solid, playing the film straight without winking at the camera at any time.  Though Knotts tends to overact at times, the other players are content to play his straight man.  Though a few might seem like extras from Mayberry (little surprise, as Andy Griffith considered extending a haunted house episode from his series into a feature length film prior to Knotts’ departure), they all make the town of Rachel seem real and keep Luther’s antics grounded in the community, rather than outlandish or out of place.

Enough of the Don Knotts acting scared pictures.  Here's another shot of Alma.

Composer Vic Mizzy (who also wrote the themes to The Addams Family and Green Acres, as well as a few other Knotts films) delivers a terrific score for the film that helps sell the spooky happenings.  While the main theme is light and bouncy, Mizzy takes a few bars and play them back during the haunted organ scene to great effect.  Once you hear the score, like Mizzy’s other works, it’s hard to forget it. 

Some have suggested through online comments that Mizzy “used” the melody to the song Mr. Ghost goes to Town for the film’s main theme.  And, though a few bars sound similar, I could find no citations supporting such statements.  I suspect Mizzy heard this song at some point, as he and the writers of Mr. Ghost (Will Hudson, Irving Mills and Mitchell Parish) were working in the New York City at the same time.  But to claim it was anything more than an inspiration seems a stretch, as the basic rhythm and feel of his score for The Ghost and Mr. Chicken is in keeping with his later works. 

But what struck me most about the movie is how it’s a prolonged Scooby Doo mystery.  A haunting is investigated and a series of scary events happen, all of which are reveled as a hoax after the villain is captured.  Though, in the movie, the “haunting” is to expose a crime, not cover one up.  Still, once the villain is tied to a chair in front of the authorities, you can imagine him shouting how he would have gotten away with it, if it weren’t for that darned reporter.

According to several Internet sites, the inspirations for Scooby Doo, Where Are You? are The Many Loves of Doby Gillis (an interview with the cartoon’s creators and writer support this claim) and I Love a Mystery, a 40s radio drama about three globe-trotting detectives.  And while it’s possible someone involved with CBS or Hanna Barbara remembered that radio show, I suspect The Ghost and Mr. Chicken was more of an inspiration to the creative team at Hanna Barbara.

I cannot support this claim, but it makes sense.  The film opened three years before the cartoon premiered, so it’s possible someone on the Hanna-Barbara team saw the film.  And, as I mentioned above, when striped of the second act, the film is almost a template for the cartoon.  Park the Mystery Machine in front of the Simmons house, add in a projected ghost and you have a Scooby Doo episode.  

Yea, tell me you couldn't see Shaggy and Scooby running through the halls of this house.

It might be hard for this film to connect with a modern audience, and not only because of the pace.  Rachel is a bit like Mayberry, with boarding houses, eccentric characters, typewriters and no cell phones.  So if you plan to show this to your kids, be prepared to explain how things were back in the 60s, at least when it comes to “wholesome family films.” 

But for older horror fans, this is a nice bit of nostalgia and a reminder that horror comedies can work without dropping to the level of the Scary Movie franchise.  Compared to many horror comedies today, The Ghost and Mr. Chicken is almost a masterpiece.